Study Links Liking Organic Food With Being A Jerk

Diners in "Portlandia" demand to know where their chicken came from

Controversial new research suggests that being a regular organic food eater increases the chance that you are "selfish." In what I like to refer to as the "Portlandia" study, Loyola University researchers concluded that being very concerned about the quality of your food = being a overly-judgemental jerk:

"After viewing a few organic foods, comfort foods, or control foods, participants who were exposed to organic foods volunteered significantly less time to help a needy stranger, and they judged moral transgressions significantly harsher than those who viewed nonorganic foods."

The researchers explained this connection by suggesting that since the "organic foodies" already defined and justified themselves morally through their food choices, they didn't feel the need to go any further.